WE HAVE WAYS OF MAKING YOU LAUGH…



With Asterix books!

Well, Blogfollowers…What-ho!

I bring news from the wonderful world of the interweb thingy…



Now, I rather like this little snippet…

It seems that a team of Germany’s most eminent scientists, psychologists and physicians have spent years researching a topic of immense significance to book lovers everywhere…

“What’s that about, then?” I hear you ask…

”A reader’s guide to delicious German cuisine?”…

”An in-depth analysis of the world’s most uplifting literature?”…

“The very meaning of life itself?”…


Nein, dear readers! …Nein!

The learned article was intended to “analyse the epidemiology and specific risk factors of traumatic brain injury [TBI] in the Asterix illustrated comic books."



Or, as another eminent researcher put it: “If you want to know about life, read the Asterix books. If you want to know about death, read the Asterix books. And if you want to know about the bits in between - read the Asterix books”.

Good.

So that’s all solved then.

I like Asterix books, too, and am delighted to announce that Bexley Libraries have a stonkingly good selection of `em!

Enjoy, but with care… Read responsibly, now.



TTFN

NOT BIG IN JAPAN, BUT….

The Bexley Blogbrary seeks global domination…

Well, dear readers, this is exciting news, as we approach the Blogbrary’s first birthday and cast our eye back upon the glorious past year…

Here was I, amiably chuntering away about books, Bexley, buses, beetroot and general badinage , vaguely hoping that people as far afield as Greenwich, Greenhithe or Gravesend might just about be picking it up via their wireless sets …but – blow me down with a feather! - see what spectacular data the Blogbrary’s market research team has just tracked down….


In the past year we’ve had “hits” from not just dear old Blighty (over 8,000 smites) or the former colonies of the United States (234), but Holland, too (101); the emerging world super-powers are represented: Russia (51) and Brazil (34).

Looking eastwards, our Blog has been enjoyed in South (although not North) Korea (34), Thailand (24) and India (21). Our Baltic markets are holding up well – Latvia has 29 devotees, while from the mighty Rockies to the windswept Yukon, from the rolling prairies of Saskatchewan to the loamy turflands of Manitoba, Baffin Island’s rugged granite shores, and the deep, frozen wastes of Hudson’s Bay, 20 of our Canadian correspondents have clicked with us.


But is there any common thread linking these nations, I hear you ask?...

An all-encompassing socio-philosophical zeitgeist?

An atavistic love of Bexley, and its cultural heritage?

Or do they all play cricket?


Who knows…But I`d still like to get hits from even further afield… Pitcairn, anyone?

Seriously, though…If you do have relatives in Rwanda, contacts in Columbia; friends in the Falklands or acquaintances in the Antipodes, then please do forward them this blog, and urge them to dip in. (Anyone know anyone at the South Pole?)

Remember our watchword, dear readers: “Today Bexley, tomorrow…THE WORLD!”



TTFN.

Doubting Thomas?... Hardly…The only way is Wessex!

Thomas Hardy, tattoos, and transports of delight…

Well, dear readers…

Venturing beyond the bounds of Bexley and entering the bowels of the great wen recently..

I espied a poem on the underground…Here it is:

The thrushes sing as the sun is going, And the finches whistle in ones and pairs, And as it gets dark loud nightingales In bushes Pipe, as they can when April wears, As if all Time were theirs.


These are brand-new birds of twelve-months’ growing, Which a year ago, or less than twain, No finches were, nor nightingales, Nor thrushes, But only particles of grain, And earth, and air, and rain

Now, be honest - that’s pretty good, isn’t it?...

Intrigued, I strained my eyes to read who the poem was by (desperately trying not to catch the attention of the burly tattooed chap with the imaginative body adornments seating directly below the poster…)


Imagine my surprise! The poem was by Thomas Hardy, who I`d always imagined to be a dry Victorian novelist and something of an `old crusty` (albeit with one of the finest moustaches known to man – not dissimilar, in fact, to the tattooed hulk now gazing back at me…)


So, safely back in dear old Bexley, the Blogbrary’s extensive research department did a bit of delving, and they found this rather dapper website…http://www.hardysociety.org/….And they also found some rather splendid Hardy poetry on Bexley’s bookshelves – here, look.


It was Hardy’s birthday recently, too…(he’s 171 you know), and it’s also the 120th anniversary of his Tess of the D’Urbervilles.


And, do you know, the more we delved – the more we unearthed…old Thomas wasn’t crusty at all, he was unique, iconoclastic and fearless; an author who `broke the doll` of Victorian literary convention, and portrayed real characters, strong women, and a real sense of a harsh, unforgiving landscape.


A surprisingly sound chap, in fact…(now, I wonder if he had any tattoos?...`Tess` & `Jude` perhaps, inked upon his knuckles?...A purposeful `Mayor of Casterbridge` etched on a bulging bicep?...And something `Under the Greenwood Tree` perhaps?)…


TTFN, dear readers. TTFN.

I'LL TRY ANYTHING ONCE....

BUT SCIENCE FICTION?...

Greetings, Earthlings.

Well now, the Blogbrarian likes to think of himself as a cultured, debonair, open-minded sort of chap, happy to indulge in new experiences, and to read almost any genre of book...

Chick Lit?...Bring it on!

Manga?...Groovy, baby.

Supernatural Romance?...Fangtastic.

Mills & Boon?...I`m your man.

Misery Memoirs?...No problem.

Jeffrey Archer?...Er, OK.

But...

But, dear reader, Science Fiction?...I can't quite bring myself to get round to it.

Back at school, when I was a young nipper, I think we were force-fed some HG Wells and John Wyndham. And as a young `cub librarian' I think I did once dabble with Kurt Vonnegut, and that was fine.

But, since then, and with the sad demise of Dan Dare, I've never again dabbled in the dark depths of Science Fiction, or even been tempted to try it again...

Until, dear reader, that was before those bright young things at the British Library alerted the Blogbrary's Research Department to the existence of their wondrous new exhibition - it's OUT OF THIS WORLD.

So, perhaps I'd better get back to a bit of it myself?...Can anyone out there tell me where to start?...(I believe that this Jules Verne chappie is an 'up & coming' new name in the ouevre?)

Just use the cosmic comments facility, below.

TTFN, then..."To infinity, and beyond!"

LADY Gaga, great writers, and their sheds: how I taught them all they know...A Blogbrary special!

Two hot news items have appeared of late in the exciting world of Libraries...
1) A colleague has just taken up ownership of his first shed (always a significant moment in a young chap's moral & spiritual development)
AND...
2) My old pal Lady Gaga has - this very week - announced that "I live halfway between reality and fantasy at all times...in that way I am a Librarian". Splendid girl, I tutored her in the finer arts of cataloguing and fashion, you know...

Regular followers of the Blogbrary will know that, along with my admiration for the work of this popular American chanteuse, I am also something of a 'shed buff', and - in my own modest way - I like to think that I have, in days gone by, helped to nurture the careers of some of the world's finest shed-based writers...

Well, as my old pal Virginia Woolf confided to me back in in 1929 "a busy household full of visitors, children, and other distractions is simply no place for a writer"...So, off she tootled to her writing shed, her "Room of one's own" as I described it at the time.

Naturally, being a shed-dweller himself, the Blogbrarian has always been keen to promote the delights of outdoor writing to other fellow pen-men (and dear, dear Virginia). Indeed, I like to imagine that I was, in no small measure, responsible for my old pal Charles Dickens' late burst of creative endeavour once he'd moved into his 'Swiss-style chalet' down the road at Gad's Hill. (Do you know, dear readers, you can still see it on view today in Rochester High Street...it's what we in the trade call a "wooden whopper", and - I confess - made me a tad envious).

George Bernard Shaw had a beauty, a wonderful wooden octagonal summerhouse in his grounds..."Why not build a revolving version, Bernie old pip?" said I one time "then it could follow the passing track of the sun".
"Capital idea, Bloggers old boy" he said "it shall be done!"

Old Roald Dahl's garden hut was a little small for my liking (and, if truth be told, somewhat spartan), but it seemed to do the trick.
Dear Dylan Thomas, of course, had his 'wordsplashed hut' (what times we had there!!!)...His boathouse, was originally built I seem to recall, in the early 1920s to house a rather splendid old Wolseley motor automobile. Poop poop!

Mark Twain (sound fellow) had his sister build a shed for him to write in, and soon his 'cosy nest' was alive with the sound of quill pen scraping parchment.
And dear, dear old Henry Thoreau - and his Walden - was widely considered by us in the know as the shed writer's writer par excellence.
Sound chaps, all...Not forgetting poor Virginia, of course. And my old pal, Lady Gaga.

Well, right-ho! That's it. (Do let me know if you have any comments, of course). It's off to work for me now, and on with my exquisitely cut meat-jacket and tie.
"Uh ra, uh ra ra!" as we so often say in the Senior Librarians Common Room.

Toodlepip.

Bexley in Bloom…

Blogbrarian’s Question Time for Topical Tips…

What-ho, my old compost companions!....
Well, spring has sprung, and it’s Bexley in Bloom time again – splendid!, you cry.
Even more splendid, Bexley Libraries have a blooming marvellous collection of gardening books for your delight and delectation.

Even better news…(I spoil you, I know) - inspired by the BBC’s Gardeners' Question Time (although I do still miss old Bill Sowerbutts), the Blogbrarian has cleared his busy schedule this week to help answer your own gardening conundrums…I`m no expert (although I know a man who is), but my tomatoes have been “mentioned in despatches”, I subscribe to `Hoof and Horn` weekly, and I know one end of a gnome from another, so I`m willing to give it my best shot.

Here are a few I’ve recently been asked:
Q “How can I improve the girth of my beetroots?”
A Go “By the book”
Q “Is it acceptable to have one’s garden gnomes on view in Bexley?”
A “Perfectly”
Q “I`ve got a bad case of fungal wilting-tip spore blight in my asparagus beds…is it infectious?”
A “Arrgghhh!!!! Get away from me, now!”

We green-fingered library folk like to be able to help, when we can.


So, dear readers & weeders, if you’ve got any more questions, just let me have ‘em, using the comments thingy-dibber at the end here…
And finally, it’s a lot to ask but…can I ask you to click here? Thank you, it meant a lot to me…

TTFN, Old Chums, and “Dig On for Victory”!

ROYAL WEDDING SPECIAL SOUVENIR 'CUT OUT & KEEP' ISSUE BLOG...



With added pomp & bunting

Well, dear readers & blog-followers, I'm afraid that you'll have to make do with a very quick one this week, as I'm almost too excited to type; my fingers are all of a tremble.

It's the excitement of the Royal Wedding, you see...(I confess, I'm not averse to a bit of pomp & pageantry myself; indeed, I must dash off shortly to add an extra bit of celebratory bunting to the exterior wall of my shed, where my special vintage parsnip & radish wine is already fermenting nicely in anticipation of the big day...)


However, before I do dash off shortly, I must remind you that Bexley Libraries have some absolutely top-drawer Kate & William books available for your particular enjoyment, which will indisputably add to your appreciation of this very special event. But get in quick, dear readers, as demand is bound to be high!

And remember, this exquisitely hand-crafted limited edition celebratory blog is not available in any shops! Download and keep your own unique personal copy today!


TTFN, old chums...